Basketball teams as girls you know

Maybe I just have too much time on my hands...

Atlanta Hawks - The girl who knows where every party is at and is drunk at every one of them. She seems cool, but try having a conversation with her while sober. You'll fail.

Boston Celtics - The brainy girl who was pretty in middle school, but spent all her time studying and never left the house in high school. Then she went to college and came back looking like a supermodel.

Charlotte Bobcats - The "Butterface". She's got every physical attribute one could hope for, except the most important one.

Chicago Bulls - Your first love, who you lost touch with but will always have a soft spot for.

Cleveland Cavaliers - The overall average girl with ONE great feature which makes her desirable. You know what I'm talking about.

Dallas Mavericks - The opinionated and argumentative girl whose buttons you love to push.

Denver Nuggets - Rich, stuck up, but oh SO hot. The girl you admire from afar and occasionally hit on when you're drunk. You don't have a chance with her and she's not worth the effort, but she's SO hot.

Detroit Pistons - She isn't pretty. She isn't interesting. But, she puts out.

Golden State Warriors - The multi-cultural hip-hop girl who's fun to hang out with and man can she shake it on the dance floor. Ultimately though, you have nothing in common and it won't work out. It's fun while it lasts though.

Houston Rockets - She's cool, but her family is crazy and you will never live up to their standards or hold up under their scrutiny.

Indiana Pacers - The "wild" girl that got kicked out of school for fighting and "other things".

LA Clippers - The goth girl with daddy issues. Underneath the make-up she's real pretty and real smart, but the second you fall in love with her, she'll stab you in the heart.

LA Lakers - The bleached-blonde, silicone-boobed beach bunny with daddy's credit card in her purse. She's occasionally fun to chill with but EXTREMELY shallow and CONSTANTLY bitching about something or someone.

Memphis Grizzlies - The girl that's "never been kissed" for some very obvious reasons.

Miami Heat - The MILF. You can tell she used to be a 10, but now she's a 7 and quickly dropping.

Milwaukee Bucks - The drama-queen who always seems to start crying when she drinks.

Minnesota Timberwolves - The girl you once dated who suddenly and inexplicably broke up with you over the phone. Then you run into her 3 months later at the mall and she introduces you to her new significant other, who's also a woman. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

New Jersey Nets - The girl with the crazy self esteem issues. She's pretty but refuses to accept it and eventually you can't see through the layer of psychoses either.

New Orleans Hornets - The driven, focused girl with the bad background but bright future.

New York Knicks - The girl who's got style, but absolutely no substance. The fashionable clothes and make-up can't hide the lack of personality.

Orlando Magic - The girl's still young but you hope that one day she'll fill out and then...

Philadelphia 76ers - The girl who seems to only be attracted to absolute jackasses and is surprised every time they cheat on her. No matter how much you try washing your hands of her though, you can't.

Phoenix Suns - The girl with a great personality, great taste and who's only a make-over away from being drop dead gorgeous. However she's not quite ready to settle down, but she might be worth the wait.

Portland Trailblazers - Your high school sweetheart who became your best friend and who you promised to marry if all else has failed by your 40th birthdays.

Sacramento Kings - The "Plain Jane". Sweet, caring and a little boring, but she can look great when she wants to.

San Antonio Spurs - Same as the Pistons. Boring. Except she speaks French and Spanish so I guess that's something. Also, she has hot friends.

Seattle Supersonics - You don't like her at first, but as you get to know her sparks fly and then just as things are getting serious, she leaves town.

Toronto Raptors - The girl who speaks with an accent she picked up God knows where.

Utah Jazz - She's cool and interesting, and she' actually quite pretty, but she's religious and is saving herself for marriage...or so she says.

Washington Wizards - The tomboy who can can hang and talk trash with the best of 'em. Heaven help you if you get beaten at something, you'll never hear the end of it.